Whenever I hear the words “oh it’s been such a bad year” I always roll my eyes at the Negative Nancy bombarding me with a ‘poor me’ story and remind him/her that every year has its ups and downs. But I shan’t be rolling even one eyelash at the end of 2020, which, let’s be honest, has been nothing short of a complete shit fest.
We started the year being choked by smoke as our beautiful country continued to burn before our eyes, we endured more catastrophic floods and then got hit with COVID-19; the pandemic that changed life as we know it. Not a person on this planet hasn’t been affected. It’s sad enough to think of how many lives have been lost due to the virus itself, but it’s so much more than a health risk; it has changed the landscape of how we are able to operate and interact with one another. Many died on their own, unable to be close to loved ones, saying their final words to their children through a screen. Many were unable to farewell their loved ones due to number restrictions at funerals, an event that simply can’t be postponed. Many lost their hard earned family businesses by simply being prohibited from opening their doors to the public. Many lost their savings and their homes, just trying to feed themselves. It breaks my heart seeing every second business empties out with a For Lease sign in the window.
When lockdown first hit, we were in shock, but I think many (myself included) started to enjoy the novelty of rest. There were a lot of positive messages online as we navigated through this new and scary world, in particular; “we’re all in this together” was spoken about frequently. We all downloaded the HouseParty app and shared a cocktail through a screen with our not so nearest but ever so dearest. But that app seemed to get deleted pretty quickly and after a while, it didn’t really feel like we were all in this together as the hostility began to build around the globe. Toilet paper may have returned to our shelves but as restrictions continued, the real financial burdens appeared, bringing with it some serious mental health issues as the rug was well and truly pulled out from underneath us. We then watched on as the divide between the left and right wings in the US became more and more prominent and tragically, more and more African American mothers grieved the death of their children at the hands of those appointed to protect and serve.
The world is in utter disharmony and it hurts.
I’m quite vocal about my beliefs which are not so black and white but more, fifty shades of grey (minus the red room). What I believe in, is compassion. I don’t judge you on your colour, race, religion, gender, sexual preference, political views or postcode. What I will judge you on, is if you’re being an asshole. And I’ll pray that you start to like yourself more, because hurt people, hurt people.
I’m not a big fan of fast running (depending how supportive my bra is) but you’ll never catch me sprint quite like when Trump is on TV and I’m heading for that remote. I do not like the views that this man has. I do not like the way he speaks to others and his actual voice is like nails on a chalkboard to my ears. However, you will not catch me sharing much about him on social media and you won’t catch me poking fun of his appearance. If I stoop to the level of the monster, haven’t I then become a version of the monster myself? I have a highly intelligent friend with wonderfully compassionate views on the world, who detests Trump more than anyone I’ve ever met. And rightly so. But I’ve told him recently that the more he focusses on Trump, the more he is giving him oxygen. And a textbook Narcissist thrives on attention.
I’m a big believer in the law of attraction. Of ‘like’ attracts ‘like’. I know that whenever I have focused on lack and scarcity, I have attracted bills and debt. I know that whenever I have focused on love and abundance, I have been showered with more than I could ever have dreamed of. Mother Theresa shared similar beliefs and was quoted as saying she would not attend anti-war protests but please call her whenever you have a pro-peace march. If you hate a Political Leader, try focussing on his opponents strengths more. No one wants to see men in their 70’s making fun of each other; it’s tacky. Gogglebox’s Chantel articulated the Presidential Debate perfectly: “It’s like watching two old people in a nursing home fight over the last digestive biscuit”.
If your thoughts, words and actions create the world you want to live in, be selective. Choose kindness, choose compassion. Get in the face of hatred, put down your sword and extend your hand (maybe an elbow is safer right now). “When they go low, we go high”. Dignified words spoken by one hell of classy woman. Not always easy to do, but always, ALWAYS worth it.
There’s a difference between being educated about current events, and being bombarded by disasters. I’ve come to a point in my life where I know that watching the news makes me unhappy. It’s a list of tragedies and disasters. I can be educated by checking news websites and choosing to click on the stories that interest me but I am officially checked out of the 6pm news. When I come home from a long day of work, I want to hear something positive, moving, inspiring. I now choose to sing, read or watch my favourite sitcoms. It’s not burying my head in the sand, it’s making a choice of what I absorb, in order to create the life I believe I deserve.
One thing that is quite clear from however long we were not allowed to leave our houses for, is that CONNECTION is vital for a happy life. Thinking back on that time when we were only allowed out of our houses for an hour a day, I used to seriously fantasise about running up to complete strangers and hugging them. If one passer by locked eyes with me on my daily walk, I felt so acknowledged and all warm and fuzzy inside. It’s crazy how much these small, seemingly insignificant aspects of our lives mean to us. And you don’t even realise that until they are taken away. Many of us went from seeing thirty colleagues a day to just seeing the occasional bird fly past your window. That’s a hard adjustment in the long run. According to an August report by the University of Sydney’s Brain and Mind Centre, Australians can expect at least a 13.7% increase in suicide deaths over the next five years; a direct result of the social and economic impact of COVID-19. We have to then ask ourselves what we really value in this life and what lessons are we going to learn from this period that HOPEFULLY, we never repeat in our lifetime. This is why I am completely floored when I hear of high profile celebrities requesting that staff, guests, support acts or anyone they encounter “not make eye contact with them when they pass each other in the hall”. Are you freaking kidding me?!!! If you think being wealthy and successful gives you the right to demand zero interaction with ‘the little people’, you’d better pray your success lasts, or you’ll be passing the same people on your way down to earth.
If you’ve read my blog before, you may recall that one of my treasured childhood memories was going to Sunday Mass and spending the whole first hour in anticipation of the moment when the priest would say “you may now offer each other the sign of peace”, followed by all of the parishioners turning to the strangers in front, behind and beside them to shake hands and recite “peace be with you”. I would wipe the excited sweat from my palms onto my dress, blow on my hands to make sure they were dry and give my best possible handshake to every human I could physically reach. The whole energy in my body and the entire room lifted, because we were brought into this present and beautiful moment by connecting with one another. I can’t think of a better time in our lives to let this story resonate with you. Connection is key. Think about the impact you may have on someone else’s life. As we approach the most magical time of year, let’s choose to create our future with thoughts, words and actions that resemble our best life.
Here’s to a world led by compassionate and intelligent thinkers. May we connect with one another and focus our attention on the world we want to live in (and don’t panic Mercury will no longer be in retrograde in a matter of days!)
Where attention goes, energy flows.
